London Rowing Club has six crews entered for this year's Henley Royal Regatta starting on Wednesday 28 June 2017. We have 3 eights entered for the Thames Challenge Cup, 2 fours in the Wyfold Challenge Cup, and another four entered for the Visitors' Challenge Cup. We also have representation in a composite eight with Molesey in the Ladies' Challenge Plate, and in a composite with Fulham Reach in the Remenham Challenge Cup. We wish success to all our crews.
Two of the Thames Cup eights and one of the Wyfold fours will be hoping to qualify through the Qualification Races on Friday 23 June.
Here are pen portaits of some of these crews:
Wyfold A:
Dom Parnell – Dom has surpassed his older brother Nick as the dominant Parnell this year. Those boys love a good wrestle and Dom now sits firmly on top. Dom brings a steady beat to the race along with is steady foot. Mr Reliable
Steve Griffiths – New to LRC this year, Stephen is your quintessential British rower. Refined, meticulous and a posh accent to match that would wouldn’t go amiss at Queens Lizzy’s Dinner table. Steve brings class to party.
Nick Parnell – Now firmly sat behind in his brothers and Steve’s pasty shadows. Nick is like a Werewolf in the full moon and brings his aggression out to race time. Really gives you the kick you need when you think you’ve got nothing left.
Matt Cummings – The Bow man. The man no boat can go without. When the goings gets tough, the tough get going. And oh my, does this man go. Like a horse drawn cart this boat is pulled along by the bow, not pushed. The often forgotten man in the boat, provides the calls, organization and the hard graft behind the scenes.
Wyfold B: The Good Lads Four
Having agreed that Matt Cummings had tried really hard this year, The Good Lads Four declined the ‘A’ boat status and now look to set up an all London final on Sunday 2nd. What this crew lack in erg scores they make up in chat and cheese jokes and will be found living the dream on their yacht moored in Henley this summer.
Stroke – James Sexton-Barrow A club record signing last summer, James comes to London from Vesta. Having decided that blue was more his colour James cemented his place in rowing’s hall of fame early this season by competing in the Parliamentary Boat Race and earning a nice hat. A big fan of a rowing spreadsheet and race data collection, James says meeting Fat Sculler would be a boyhood dream come true.
Three – Luis Orozco Living proof that with Brexit looming we should now be looking to the Commonwealth to find our imported talent. Though he won’t be propping up the NHS, Canadian Luis will be propping up the crew, fearful that a poor performance at Henley could see him loose his citizenship. Luis also has a girlfriend who rows at UL.
Two – Jack Davidson When asked how much weight he can squat, Jack’s answer was “all of it”. This impressive performance in the gym makes up for his tiny hands, for which Jack uses a ‘special grip’ on his oar handle. Despite this abnormality Jack has no problem with the ladies having recently become the face of Hackett’s Henley sponsorship. Ladies, if you’re interested, Jack is now available on all good dating apps.
Bow (steers) – Rupert Price Still bitter about getting rowed through by Brazil at the U23 World Champs, Rupert took last summer’s Rio games as a personal ‘up yours’ and decided to come out of retirement. Having spent a year training solidly to seek revenge, this ex Cambridge lightweight is still the heaviest man in the boat.
Thames Cup A
Charlotte Fuscone - Cox Charly the brain of the outfit and uses her size and presence to dominate the crew, bending them to her will. Her coxing learnt from the hard streets of Oxford, she is used to the rough and tumble of the bumps – and as such, the tideway has nothing she cannot handle. Her lines are savage and her calls deadly, with Charly the quickest path to victory is assured.
Rory Corbett - Stroke Rory or DC (Daddy Corbett), as he is more commonly known, is our rhythmic stroke-man. Being the oldest- I mean - veteran in the boat, he brings a wealth of experience to the fore with his dulcet Irish tones. Providing soothing words of encouragement to our cox, his words gently waft their way down to the bow, filling everyone with joy. Having done some rowing in his heyday (Former Irish Junior), DC is keen to relive his lost youth and lead us to Henley glory!
Lord George Trelawny – 7 seat George is our freckled ginger fresh faced number 7. Recently from Radley, he kept his head down for the first half of the season in classic school-boy style, sniffing out the weakest link before coming out of his shell and providing witty one-liners, crushing many with his barbed tongue (also used to great effect on the lower forms during his school days…..). Big red (so named for his passionate love of Jeremy Corbyn) unites the boat as only a true comrade can.
Christopher Linn – 6 Seat Chris, having suffered many humiliations years previously, decided to leave Vesta and join his betters here at London. Considering himself the engine room of the team, he lays down the watts in the middle of the boat. Known for his calm and serene temperament, you never hear his voice raised in anger. Much like a serene Gorilla with back hair to match, Chris is a valuable asset, trusted to put his all into every race.
Matthew Piechowicz – 5 Seat Matt our five-man, having overcome his cookie addiction from the previous year, has now moved on to stronger stimulants and is never seen far from a coffee house. When not shooting espressos, he can be found lurking in the London Resis, labelling his food and polishing his bike. In the boat, Matt is no slouch - he can be witnessed hooooning the boat, experiencing high levels of discomfort sacrificed for speed.
Nick Adams – 4 Seat Nick has found his way to us from the Solent, regaling us nonstop about his Southampton Uni boat club days. Nick is another London Resis who has a large appetite but surprisingly low food bill. Beloved by all of the coaching staff, Nick is the very definition of positivity and optimism in the boat. No crew too tough, no session too hard, his glass is always half full brimming with a can-do attitude. But you would not know what a big dog he is, as he is often pulling so hard in the boat he can barely even make a noise.
Jooooossssssshhhhhhh – 3 Seat Picked out as an example of catch preparation by the coaching staff, Josh is the model rower. A bearded hero... no more words are needed.
Aidan O’Flaherty – 2 Seat Aidan is our second Irishman in the boat (this is why I voted out #Brexit - Ed). With a honed physique that would not be out of place in ancient Greece (which he uses to devastating effect on other crew members housemates) Aidan is the erg-monkey of the boat; lifting the bows out of the water sending the rhythm back up the boat, whether we like it or not. A useful addition to the crew, he also has magic hands which can rub away all aches and pains that we often have… or say we have.
William Golding - Bow Will, or Little G, is the technical wizard at bow. Originally from the deep dark North, he is our token Geordie. In addition, his ginger hair aids our crew diversity! When not being the sharpest tool in the boat, Little G can be found undercover at Thames undermining their junior section, coaching a unique way to row. From bow, he has a great view of our blade work - adding to the benefits of having a coach in the boat. He is often found sobbing at the end of sessions at the sheer technical proficiency he has witnessed from the bow.
Thames Cup B
Crew description: The “Commonwealth Boat”, not even Brexit can get rid of these guys (except Lucas) and their fat ergos.
Kim “Kimbo Slice” Wilkinson Kimbo Slice is pound for pound the toughest member of this year’s Thames Challenge Cup crew. Much like the street fighter turned MMA star, Kimbo isn’t afraid to take out anyone in her path. Formerly coxing for Bath University, Kim was sought after by LRC both for her ferocious coxing ability and happy-go-lucky on land personality. Driving the big boys boat into Henley, Kim plans on keeping the boys fuelled with her baking abilities.
Lucas “Muffin Man” Vitale Antique wheeler dealer by day, Lucas “Muffin Man” Vitale, is the first of our international athletes, bringing his French flair and lightning legs to the stroke seat. This is his second season competing for London, where he is now famous for his final war cry, which puts fear into the hearts of all who hear it and transcends all language barriers. Usually known for his stylish tendencies, his Henley moustache has received mixed reviews, but ultimately the extra speed it brings is what matters most to this dedicated athlete. Listen out for this guy as he comes down the enclosures.
Seb Thomas The most laidback member of the crew. He plays a key role, translating the Frenchy rhythm into English and taking his stroke man’s princessy demands in his stride. He’s always working to educate the crew, sharing informative pictures and videos. When not rowing, Seb spends his time pursuing his dream of becoming Don Draper and releasing his creative side.
Woody Sandhu At six we have Woody, everyone’s favourite chopstick, who has the cool head necessary to lead out the Kiwi trio behind him. The tallest member of the crew at 6’9’’, Coach Downie frequently points out what a lanky b****** he is. Some may think all that limb length would make him a little uncoordinated, but rest assured, this guy still knows how to move - just keep a distance of 2m at all times on the dance floor.
Tom “Big Dawg” Monaghan Our first chap from our Kiwi Triad, Tom’s exceptionally long and shapely calves add elegance (and power) to the middle four meat pack. The keenest member of the crew, this guy is always up for going for a pull and never shies away from the hard work. He’s in England for an “Overseas Experience” so please feel free to come over, introduce yourself and teach him about your culture.
Jamie “Ginge” Saunders Second member of the Kiwi Triad and the oldest member of the crew. Ginge is thoroughly enjoying retirement, which gives him more time for rowing, watching sport and napping with the dog. Always willing to share his wisdom with the boys (and Kim), don’t be deceived by the cuddly hipster look and bushy moustache, this man once fought off fierce competition to become the fastest club sculler in New Zealand.
Todd “T. O. Double” Hale Third member of the Kiwi Triad, a man of few words. Me Todd, me row.
Dylan Wing Raised in the wilderness on a diet of maple syrup, Dylan is our lone Canadian. In a previous life this big kid was a basketball star, a road cyclist and, last but not least, a speed skater (he’s retained his love of horrifyingly tight clothing). Thankfully he’s settled with rowing and is one half of our bow pair power couple - forged in the fires of Varese, their bond is unbreakable.
Matt Reeder The other half of our bow pair power couple - Matthew Reeder, our technician in the bow seat, is on a mission to win a Henley medal in order to prove that “vegans can do anything”. It’s hard to believe a man who lives off of tree nuts and chickpeas can lay down such savage amounts of watts. In his free time Matt enjoys lounging in his hammock on the resis balcony and riding his bike, so long as the water he hydrates with doesn’t harm the habitat of the aquatic life.
Thames Cup C
Cox Theodora Robinson
Str Simon Harris
7 Lachie Ives
6 Alex Fothergill
5 Adrian Theed
4 Mark Shimmin
3 Ralph Humphrey
2 Shaun Martin
Bow Stewart Harries
Visitors:
Andrew Morgan
Tom Neeld
Ben Lawton
Ben Benzecry
